Harry Potter and The DORK Lord!

Most people are under the misapprehension that the Deathly Hallows was written as an end to the series.A line of thought brought about by the theory that if things don't have an ending they just keep going on and on and on and on and on and ..........well, you get the idea.

They are wrong.The purpose of the book is simple. JK Rowling loathes Harry and Dumbledore and has decided to spite them in the finale because it can now no longer affect her money inflow.Why do i say this?Lets look at what Harry does in the previous books.

First book : He saves the Philosopher's stone , single handedly fights off Lord Voldemort, and essentially the entire universe.

Second book : He battles against a 50 foot snake with magical killer eyes, and though he nearly dies, destroys a part of Voldemort's soul, preventing his return, and once again singlehandedly saving the universe.

Third book : He breaks an innocent person out of Hogwarts, battles a million soul sucking Dementors, and also goes back time to preserve the timeline, and hence the space time continuum without which the universe would collapse. So he basically saves the universe.

Fourth book : Doesn't save the universe this time, but he battles dragons, has underwater adventures, becomes one of the youngest Triwizard champions in history and fights the Dark Lord, and escapes making him look something of an ass, really.....

Fifth book : Strives through public humiliation, sets up and underground movement to overthrow an tyrranical ruler, fights off a dozen death eaters, and then kicks the Dark Lord out of his body, using his inner strenght. He then goes on to find out that the fate of the universe rests solely on his shoulders................not that we didn't know that already.

Sixth book : Takes on a bajillion mutant zombies, fights off death eaters, and hunts down Voldemort's right hand man, who he is unable to fight because he is shot in the back. He then decides to go on a mission to save the universe.

Now lets look at what he does in the seventh book.He plans the trip and the details involved.......wait a sec, that was Hermione.He destroys the Hufflepuff cup...........wait, Hermione too.He destroys the Slytherin locket........... no, Ron does THAT.He goes to the forest to Voldemort's secret lair.........and then drops dead.Ah ! But despite all of that , he gets into a brilliant battle against Voldemort and vanquishes him doesn't he? No! Voldemort's spell bounces back at him.It's the equivalent of bouncing a laser beam off a mirror.......doesn't take all that much brain power or skill really.....an idiot could do it.....which is pretty much what happened.Oh yea , and he also led a completely catastrophic mission into the Ministry of Magic, AND to Godric's Hollow AND to Lovegood's house. AND he acted like a complete retard sitting around in a forest eating fungi for six months.Not much of a hero when you think about it.Alright.

She does that, but atleast she leaves our thoughts and views on Dumbledore untarnished right? I mean there's no way she could make DUMBLEDORE look bad right?Oh wait a sec! D'OH!Allow me to ennumerate Rowling's process of "destroying Dumbledore."Alright! Lets see how i can bump off people's liking this barmy old codger. They keep going on about Harry this and Dumbledore that. But do they ever say anything about ME? No! Fine! Let me mess up their big grand heroes and I can have my time at last! I've got my paycheck already, not much those fans can do now! *evil villain laugh*

Alright Harry is easy, i just make him look like a retard. But what about Albus. I need to completely annihilate HIM. People think he's perfect right? I think i'll mess him up REAL bad! What's the worst i can do? First i need to mess up his family. Oh yeah, i'll make his entire family crazy. Crazy Dad. A KILLER! I like that, yes, that's a good one. Sadistic psycho moms always sell well. I think i'll make her a regular Martha Stewart. Yes, that'll do nicely. I've already made his brother loopy. That's good. But i think I'll make him an idiot as well in this one. But that's not enough...... I KNOW!I'll give him a sister only to make her a crazy psycho girl...............ROWLING YOU'RE A GENIUS!

Now for the man himself. Lets make him a ..........WORLD DOMINATION MAN! You can't get more evil than that. *eviler laugh* AND lets make him a Dark wizard, AND lets make him out to dominate muggles. After all, no one like a racist.But that's not enough. Yes! I have it. He kills his own sister. Perfect! >:)And there you go. The TRUE purpose of the seventh book. I hope that you will join me in my campaign to obliterate all copies and all memory of it now that you understand it's real purpose.